“My mother keeps telling me how good it is that ‘it’ is gone.”
Many women feel compel to have an abortion due to people or circumstances in the course of their lives. Many tears have been shed over this, even by those who remain behind her decision. We specifically ask some women: What was the hardest part of the abortion for you, and what help you the most to cope with it?
And these were the answers of the women *:
Tatiana:
The hardest part was the morning of the demolition. Somehow I was hoping for a miracle: on the terribly long drive to Best abortion center in Dubai, in the waiting room, even when I had to run to the chair in my surgical shirt. All along I was hoping that my partner would change his mind and say we can keep the child. Or that we have a serious car accident on the way there, that there are some complications and that I cannot have an operation, I even want an earthquake that would bring the clinic to collapse. As I walk into the operating room, I imagine how nice it would be if I just drop dead on the spot. I would have prefer anything than to have to take this step. And so far nothing has help me in dealing with this pain.
Carola:
The hardest thing for me was that my partner would have like to become a dad. Talking so much with him help both of us.
Johanna:
The hardest thing for me was when I had to go to the hospital because of heavy bleeding (on my birthday) and it was discover that I was still 70 percent pregnant. Unfortunately, XY slept and did not find out that I unfortunately still had residual tissue in me after the “drug-base” abortion. There was no information about the blood loss and how long the process would take. Unfortunately, breaking off is still a taboo subject with too little education – at least that’s how it is here with us.
Dana:
For me the worst was making a decision and going to the gyms chair. The exchange with other women ** help me the most.
Melli:
Worst of all was the moment I woke up and realize it was over. Until I heard a woman sob next to me and learn that because of her religion and family, she had “no choice” but to have an abortion. She call herself “the mother of evil”. I felt helpless, want to help her take the pain away, and at the same time felt miserable because I had broken up myself. It’s been 8 months now and we write almost every day. It helps us a little.
Sandra:
For me it was the hardest thing only days later to realize what I want all the time, namely to keep the child. Unfortunately much too late. And that my mother keeps telling me that it’s good that ‘it’ is gone and that I am not ready for it. Since the abortion, contact with my mother has been worse than ever because she can’t handle the way I talk about my baby. In order to give it a face, I gave it an identity. She is my little worm, immortalize as a tattoo as a star forever. I also promise her that I would “live” her life. Since then I have become more courageous.
Betty:
For me, the 5 hours in this room, alone and insecure, was the worst thing I had to go through. My partner at the time want the child so much, but I couldn’t. Shortly after the cancellation, he show me a video about a cancellation on YouTube. That was tough, but probably his way of dealing with it . I wish I had never seen this video. I found that very horrible. The child would now be over 12 years old. It’s pretty tough when you think about it.
Melina:
The worst was the time before. Counting down the minutes and knowing exactly that my baby will stop growing and it will be taken from me. And then waking up and suddenly this emptiness … I still can’t deal with it. I always feel like I’m empty in my stomach.
Mathilda:
For health reasons, I had to let go of 2 in this way within a very short time. I also get a tattoo so I feel like they aren’t just erase.
Leonie:
It’s always hard to break off, but if you don’t want it, it’s hell. On the day of the operation – contrary to what I had plan – I had to wait 4 hours in my room before it start. Those 4 hours were the worst 4 hours I’ve ever had. I would have love to just go home again, but it was too late anyway. After the operation I was so exhaust and just cry. I also broke off contact with my family for the time being. In the meantime it keeps coming up, which is normal. In order to cope better with my grief, I had a candle made for me. We always light them on the 5th of the month.
Christian:
The worst part was the pressure from my ex-partner and the time afterwards when I wasn’t allow to speak a word to him or to anyone else about it. My daughter help me a lot during that time, we did a lot together back then. I think without this event my life would not have been the way it is now and I would not be such a strong woman now.
Babsie:
For me the hardest thing is seeing pregnant women or mothers with babies. I then always subconsciously touch my stomach and wonder how it would feel now. What can be done about it? I don’t know. I always run away. For more about abortion click here.
